10:29 p.m. - 2007-09-26
(Blank Page) Can't remember how it began to end.
Blank page, forgot why it had to end. Our memories in the pouring rain. Is this heartache the reason why I feel so drained? Doesn't matter, because before I met you, I was already half dead. After you left, I lost more than my head.
You never changed, I'm sure you're still the same. You were never good at learning from your mistakes. I'm sure you haven't left your home. I know you're not happy in your comfort, you just stay because it's all you've ever known, besides my name.
We shared so much more than just love and pain. Do you remember when we first met? The sun was out, and since then, began what we referred to as love. Growing together, smiling together, hurting together, as one. You were everything I ever thought about. So much we had; and then, as the day turns to night, we fell apart.
Blank page, can't really remember those last few days. I tried hard to forget the pain, and can't recall how our love began to end. I felt betrayed, I felt like my world was suddenly gray. I couldn't take the hurt for long. My heart felt as if it had become infected; in order to survive I had to cut it out.
In bed, the next day, we pretended that everything was still the same. Upon inspecting my chest, you realized what I had done the night before, our love was dead. Since then, all I've known is rain. I'm tired of waiting for your call, in vain.
I hope you're happy with your new last name. Does he give you all you want? Does he tell you that he loves you like I told you that night? Does he do all of the things I did just to be with you? Does he make you forget about me? When you hear my name, may you draw a blank page. Forget the pain that I caused you in those days.
I remember that I used to love you so much, and it seemed as if everything else just faded away. You were the one that made my life seem less gray. Kate, you will always have a place in my chest. Your name, I will never forget, because "a thing of beauty is a joy forever", or so they say.